a merry christmas and an unhappy new year.

for many reasons, the holidays not the least of them, this blog has fallen by the wayside.  in order to catch up on a very long, very exhausting few weeks, i will tell you a story...one that, now that i'm pausing to reflect on it, begins and ends at the zoo.

last time we checked in, we were all set to gear up for some serious holiday cheer.  david and i were much anticipating a shared long weekend off together with our chicago clan plus my parents and brother travis.  we spent the evening of december 23rd checking out zoo lights, an event at the lincoln park zoo where it stays opened after hours with billions of lights and music and crafts, plus or minus a glimpse of some animals.  we've been spoiled with an absurdly warm winter so far, so after just a few minutes in the low 20s, we rushed to our favorite vietnamese restaurant for some vegetable pho to thaw ourselves.

after the little elves were tucked into bed, david kept me company in santa's workshop, fingers burning through the final stitches of my knitting projects, and finally wrapping everything up in the paper the kids made with their fat footprints.  at the library several weeks ago, i helped myself to a large stack of old library book cards, being used as scrap paper now that everything is computerized.  i love these old cards--they are neat and well preserved yet much older than me.  we had fun reading our titles and dates aloud as we opened gifts christmas morning.

emily's cowl

nani's scarf

 christmas eve brought our out of town guests and a continued tradition of indian dinner (two years running now), then early to bed to prepare for the big day ahead.  i awoke in the wee hours to knead dough for cinnamon rolls, only to find that for the second year in a row, my dough hadn't risen.  the year prior, i ran out early xmas morning hunting for yeast and learned two things, one, that you cannot get active dry yeast on xmas morning unless you make it yourself, and two, the city is unusually quiet and serene in a way it's not any other day.

i had anticipated another yeast disaster and bought several packets this year, but exhausted, i covered it with plastic and went back to bed.  as predicted, christmas day brought bright blue skies and temps in the high 40s.   i so enjoyed my unplanned christmas walk the year before, i suggested we do the same this year together to relax and connect as a family before the gift exchange.  we settled on a walk to our favorite beach, because how many times in our lives might we spend xmas at a beach?!

christmas morning started like any other, with awaking to the sound of our gymnast toddler bouncing in her crib.

we let the boys sleep in a little as we got changed and dressed and had a snack.  next, bean set off to wake the men in her life.  first, dad.

unsuccessful.  so, we moved on to reese.  yes, he does actually sleep in our bathroom.  not an exaggeration.

the groggy boys

after getting dressed and strapped into the stroller, we were off to the beach.  for days we'd been so excited for this outing.

unfortunately, this excitement was not shared by all.  kept far from the beach for months now, our little mermaid was thrilled at the chance take a dip in lake michigan.  she was quite unhappy when her parents would not permit this.

and so, back in the stroller we went as bean screamed all the way home.  and that is life with kids.  you plan and plan and anticipate and if the stars don't align, everyone needs to readjust their expectations and plans rather quickly.

however, we came in to find that the cinnamon rolls made an impressive comeback and made for a really spectacular xmas breakfast.  i used this recipe but of course,  replaced half the white flour with spelt.    they were a huge hit.

christmas was a true success.  i got every single thing on my list, socks, yoga pants, a sweatshirt, tea, and two hanks of malabrigo wool, as well as some surprises.  so many great gifts, and the kids really cleaned house.  presents had to be opened in three phases to allow sufficient time for naps and meals in between, and again they have more clothes and toys than they could possibly know what to do with.

mom and dad finished off the night with a looooooong christmas run that left our joints aching with great views of the city alit for the holiday, and we came back to an impressive xmas spread including pork chops from heritage foods, a rare meat indulgence for dad.

since i know you've all been silently cheering me along, i am happy to report i did indeed finish my xmas knitting.  i think for the most part, people genuinely liked their gifts, and if they didn't, they couldn't say anything because it would hurt my feelings.  so there.  on december 26th went into such severe withdrawal that i have knit several projects since.  i was excited to turn my attention elsewhere, but i'd become so attached to my knitting, i really couldn't function without it.  fortunately, there are many birthdays and birth days coming up, so i have plenty to keep my fingers busy.

modeling their gifts, aunt emmy and uncle eric

over the next couple of days, david's case of the minor sniffles started to trickle down to other members of the family.  bean became a little stuffy, but without her pacifier she continued to sleep well and play nicely during the day.  but as we approached the new year, reese also became ill, and bean became downright miserable.

still working the 3-11 shift, i came home minutes into 2012 to find my parents looking utterly weary on the couch with a shriveled, almost lifeless looking little bean.  she developed a horrible cough so violent it made her gag and left her hoarse, she refused to eat or drink anything for days, a constant stream poured out of her eyes and nose, and she could barely breathe.  after consulting with dad working overnight, i gave her a prolonged steam bath, some benadryl, and put her to sleep with a humidifier.  when david got home the next morning as she woke only about 25% alive, we had a long conversation about whether or not to take her to the er.  new years day without a hope of urgent care or a pediatrician, the er would be our only option to treat what appeared to be a losing battle against pneumonia.  

i've had sick, sick, sick patients who can't survive without constant oxygen, who have smoked 2 packs a day for 45 years, who have lung cancer, chronic bronchitis, emphysema, who are trached, vented, intubated...i'm telling you, i've never seen a person so acutely ill as my sweet little princess was.  but knowing what trauma would await her at the hospital and that between the two of us we could monitor her closely, we decided to keep her home.  it was a looooooong road to recovery, complicated by dad coming down with stomach flu new years afternoon, then me the day after, trying to quarantine the kids as that might have actually killed them superimposed on the respiratory infection...my night with the stomach flu was particularly challenging, between hourly sprints to the bathroom reese doesn't sleep in, poor dad barely out of the woods himself running to reese's bathroom to somehow latch him to my limp body to nurse him out of his misery temporarily.

being so sick is always a low point, but also very humbling, especially as a care provider.  and, while i was crippled with fear that i couldn't care for the kids when they so needed it, it was reassuring to see dad and particularly nani (jeannette was fortunately out of town for this ordeal) really step in and care for whoever needed the most care at any given moment.  after about 100 steam baths, 47,000 gallons of water converted to steam to humidify our apartment, 100 boxes worth of snotty tissues, bottles of saline spray, bulb syringes, and many, many, many doses of motrin and benedryl, these kids (and grown ups) really pulled through the darkest hour.  reese has been whinier than usual as he's working hard on a new tooth, and i went to get bean the other morning and found her room, crib, and self splattered liberally with vomit, but other than that, we have survived with a new army of antibodies to ensure none of us ever goes through that again.

the kids are back to their old antics, playing together, reading, running around, filling the rooms with laughter, raiding our alcohol supply, etc.

last friday brought one last day of 50 and sunny, and with two mostly well kids, two parents off work, and two grandmas, it seemed only reasonable that we head to the zoo.  bean has had many trips to the zoo in her short life, but this is the first time she really, truly enjoyed herself.  finally bipedal, she had an absolute ball with so much space to run around and explore, and the wonder on her face when her favorite story characters came to life, roaring lions and tigers, swinging monkeys, mooing cows, was really great.

illness can be a large setback, and for babies in particular it seems to stunt their development temporarily.  just learning to eat solids, reese self imposed a liquid only diet for a few weeks while he was on the mend.  he's just starting to gain his appetite back for cereal and purees, and really likes red split lentils.  bean emerged from her brush with death with a touch of brilliance...suddenly she speaks english and spanish, saying the names of objects she's pointed to for months now.  she even identifies letters she sees in words.  really impressive.  we're a ways from verbs and sentences, but this is a language breakthrough like none before it.  both kids made their triumphant return to music class this week.

david has been enjoying a few weeks of elective that he's spent honing some ultrasound skills, which is fast becoming the future of emergency medicine.  or it is the future, and is fast becoming the present, maybe?  in any case, he's really enjoying himself.

some changes on my floor have allowed me to work a rather ideal schedule of two 7a-7p shifts per week, leaving me plenty of time to do whatever else i'd like to, including picking up some shifts in the icu, and hopefully i'll soon do some shadowing in the er.  

other than that, i've stayed busy with my knitting, some leisure reading, and working on a few goals we've set for ourselves this new year.  i am hoping to take on my first garment project for myself in the next few months along with some other knitting goals.  we each have made some goals for our running as well.  david and i have a shared project to make every recipe in our new vegetarian cookbook before 2013.  the book is divided by season, with 12 menus, or roughly one per week for the year.  it's simple, manageable and organized, so far very delicious, and has become a fun ritual for us.  we keep a baggie with the numbers 1-12 and every time we finish a recipe, we pick the next one out of the bag.  this week we had sweet potato collard green coconut curry with jasmine rice and fried tempeh.  really, really good.

anyhow, after a really blessed christmas, we rang in the new year by weathering our worst storm thus far as a family, and we have stronger bonds and immunity to show for it, which are just as great of blessings.  thank you to all for the thoughtful, fun gifts you sent to us and the kids.  a special thanks to nani, who somehow managed to take care of all of us without ever falling victim to our various plagues--we quite literally could not have survived without her help that week.

winter officially arrived in chicago yesterday with 6 inches of snow...stay warm, safe and well, and we'll be in touch soon.

this week or so in pictures

cool ornament from my aunt roshanna!  she always sends the best gifts!

i suppose it's been almost two weeks since my last post...i have totally lost track of time between working 7 straight days and the busy christmas workshop waiting for me the few hours here and there i am home.  i finally had two days off and my fingers have been feverishly busy on the needles in spite of the hopelessness i will finish gifts in time for christmas.  my work is really cut out for me, but we will do what we can.  the kids seem to somehow understand the demands of this task and have for the last few days been remarkably self sufficient and exceptionally "gentle" with these projects when they become interested.  i still do love knitting, but i'll be relieved when i can do something additional with my down time!

anyhow, other happenings this week.......

the kids are still incredibly cute with fat faces that i eat morning, noon and night.

she might have a future in cage fighting.

bean is getting really interested and actually quite good at tidying up.  she loves putting dishes in the sink and dishwasher, wiping up spills on the floor, and loading/unloading everything from her bookshelf to toybox to dresser drawers.  it's the reloading that's really impressive...her dad and i have not yet developed that trait.  she's becoming very interested in helping with reese too, changing his diaper, wiping him, washing his hair...while this usually makes him physically uncomfortable (a lot of soap in eyes), he relly enjoys the attention.  she also started saying "puppy" this week, which is pretty cute.  we're so excited about her becoming more resilient and easy going about her sleeping habits as well.  she'll basically sleep 12 hours straight from when she goes to bed, takes one solid afternoon nap without a fuss, and really shocked us for the first time in her life the other day when she fell asleep in her stroller around nap time, woke up, and went BACK to sleep in her crib for a real nap immediately thereafter.  her refusal to do so the previous 1.5 years has ruined more outings and entire days than i care to mention.  a few nights ago she hid her pacifier somewhere during one of her organizational frenzies and then went to sleep without it no problem, so we never attempted to retrieve it.  just like that.  amazing.

 today we bought her first pair of winter boots, which are big and rigid and clunky, but will soon become necessary once this big scary winter rears its ugly head (for now, we're still enjoying a sunny 50 degree day here and there, see below).  she was stumbling around like a drunk astronaut and needed a much larger and cornerless space to explore, so we set her loose to terrorize the 15th floor...

 the big boy is, well, a very big boy.  every time we make him a larger and larger bowl of cereal, we say to ourselves, we'll save part of this for next time.  and then he finishes it.  without pausing.  i don't know if we're better baby food chefs this time around, but he also eats anything we put in his mouth without so much as an inquisitive look.  hopefully he'll remain such an unfussy eater.  he seems to be doing better with his naps now that we're paying more attention to them.  and, i noticed this evening he's sprouting his first tooth...david couldn't believe it since he's only 7.5 months old, and i reminded him that the average age is 4-6 months, which must mean a fair number of babies are born with teeth since bean was toothless until month 16 or so...

and aside from knitting and working, we HAD to take full advantage of the beautiful weather...yes, these photos were taken just this past monday!  finally got back out to northerly island.  this is the view of the city, my favorite, that i've mentioned before here.

dad made us this delicious stew with gingery greens that we all enjoyed for dinner over some kalinga rice:















and we received "fresh food fast," a vegetarian cookbook by peter berley that we're REALLY excited about.  big plans for this book that we'll talk more about later.  for now it's time to rest up for the several hours of power knitting ahead!  see you in 2012!

this week in pictures

we awoke this morning to the first legitimate dusting of snow on the ground...not my favorite sight, but to make it this far without a few inches is something to be grateful for.  however, i will say that losing the perceived hour of daylight between michigan and illinois is really hard on the circadian rhythm.  the sun sets literally at 4pm here.  at 4:30 it's pitch black outside.  it leaves our bodies wondering why it's bedtime when we aren't even yet hungry for dinner, and leaves my brain wondering why i'm not busy knitting away with these kids long since shipped off to dreamland.

it also really complicates our ability to leave the house.  in addition to the usual obstacles (somebody, adults included, is always hungry or tired), winter brings far fewer hours of daylight, which really limits the areas we can walk/run around safely , and putting two kids in snowsuits and packing them into the stroller just to grab something from the drug store is often too daunting a thought to even consider.  thus, we become more sedentary and stir crazy these months...it has begun.

walking to whole foods at 5pm

we have been busy indoor bees this week.  as anticipated, the tree went up.  i can take absolutely no credit for it.  dad really took one for the team to provide us with the centerpoint of our holiday enjoyment, and enjoy we do.  i'm sitting next to it in its twinkly splendor as i type.  this is the first time bean can really appreciate it, and reese is doing so in his own way as well.

now that david cares about running and fitness again, our workouts have parted ways, as he's no longer interested in walking at a good clip while i jog beside him.  compounded with our 2 hours of daylight, i've said goodbye to my beloved runs by the lakeshore and have adapted to running in more populated areas, usually the magnificent mile.  it's crowded, but fortunately i don't run much faster than the window shoppers browse, so it's not too bad.  i take my camera to capture charming holiday moments like this:

sorry folks, she is wearing underwear.

the kids really got slammed with shots this week, four apiece.  we felt especially bad for bean, who we promised was only getting a flu shot, only to find that, attentive parents and practitioners we are, we totally overlooked her 15 month appointment.  so she got hit with flu and dtap, undoubtedly the most painful combination of vaccines possible, and two others for good measure.  i will maintain until i die that my most recent tdap was worse than reese's labor and delivery.  poor stinks.  but, they seem relatively unscathed and have been indulging me, dancing around to christmas music most hours of the day.

both of them have turned real corners in their eating.  reese developed a real taste for sweet potato/apple/carrot/prune puree that has him scarfing down bowls of cereal that would put some adults to shame.  bean has really excelled at using utensils.  not surprisingly, she's quite insistent upon it now.  she's not incredibly effective yet, but she refuses to eat at all unless she's holding a spoon, so she splatters food all over the kitchen while i sneak bites in her mouth.  clever as she is, she eventually catches on and needs to have spoons in both hands, so every meal requires at least three spoons.

and if she sees you using something besides a child appropriate utensil to feed yourself, be prepared to hand it over.

we bought some suction bowls to try and contain the mess somewhat and make it easier to aim the spoon without a moving target, but these were no match for the might of bean.

reese has gotten so proficient at eating and bean so exceptional at feeding, it was only a matter of time before the two of them joined forces:

bean has added to her repertoire of intelligible words "book" and "cup" although she uses these words for many objects not limited to books and cups.  she is also able to recognize some letters now.  she continues to say "dai dai" for bye bye, but lately she's been saving a "bah bah" exclusively for her friend the el train that passes frequently by her window.  she continues to expand upon her dance skills, and has developed a real fondness for the free credit score commercial, which she has fully choreographed.  reese continues to slither and nudge rather aggressively around the apartment and his dad claims he is starting to reach for us when we pick him up.

other than that, my fingers have been busy on the needles whatever spare moment or two i can find.  how is it that i've been knitting non stop and have only two xmas projects completed, and one turned out rather poorly (sorry, dad)?  fortunately, i'm not knitting so much that i no longer enjoy it (so it's hard to imagine when that point would come), but the project i just started is really rather taxing.

say what you will, but to me this appears to be more thread than yarn.  it's so delicate, my needles feel dopey trying to poke their blunt noses through the loops, and this project is not incredibly forgiving of fat, dirty, curious little hands and mouths.  it doesn't lend itself to mom knitting, so it's progressing quite slowly.  so slowly that i've been working on a side project that moves rather fast so i can still feel a sense of accomplishment.

i can't remember how old i was when my grandma gave me my first pair of needles and yarn, but i think it was before i started school...certainly a needle and thread was.  right now bean takes a real interest in anything i'm doing, but i'm really excited for her dexterity and attention span to grow to the point where we can spend long hours knitting together and sipping tea.  and reese, too.

this week in pictures.

hello, december.

we're happy to maintain temps in the mid 40s as we ease gently into what's continually being hyped as the worst winter chicago will have seen since the last ice age.

david started the week and will end the week very busily with work.  thus, the few days in between have been devoted to a lot of relaxation.  two significant events have recently transpired in david's life that have translated into some notable changes in his lifestyle.  first, the 10k we ran a few weeks back has really inspired him to commit more of our nonexistent free time to fitness.  we have plans to run our next race in february, and while i continue to take the approach of "completion=awesome," he's set some really impressive goals for himself to improve on his previous performance, which is really great.

second, as i suspected, after completing eating animals by jonathan safran foer, david instantaneously modified his eating habits and outlook on food production in our country.  we never cook meat at home, but we have begun to closely examine how we source our other animal products, which has led to us paying 2x more for eggs (which we already payed about 2x more than average for), because after doing some research on our current eggs, we felt we could support a better operation.  we were very pleased to find eggs in chicago from a farm that treats its animals humanely and with respect.  this action is representative of the responsibility we as humans really should take seriously...it's not eating meat or animal products that i object to, but the way in which we source those products.

it's easy to forget when milk is in a carton or animal parts are already separated and packaged that these items were once alive or came from living things, and if we choose to use them for our own nourishment and gain, we should do so humbly and with dignity.  we are so busy searching for a bargain, we overlook the tremendous ramifications that might have on not only individual animals, but ecology, the job market, communities, and our own health.  yes, buying quality and humane food costs more.  a lot more.  but as humans at the top of the food chain, we can choose to eat less or spend more.  instead, many of us choose to eat more and spend less at the expense of much more than just animal welfare.  i would argue it's just this ability to reason rather than say, our braun, that has us atop the foodchain to begin with...we ought to use it more often.

if you knew where your food comes from, you'd truly be appalled.  take it from my husband, who when we met stated, "no meal, including breakfast, is a meal without meat."  yesterday, we ate dinner at our favorite vietnamese restaurant where we've had several delicious pork chops and huge bowls of beef pho the past few years.  last night, we enjoyed wonderful fresh spring rolls, a mango and papaya salad, and huge bowls of vegetable pho.  was it the same?  no.  was it memorable and delectable?  yes.  we're excited to rediscover the chicago food scene with a greener outlook.

anyway!  back to our days of relaxation.  we made this pizza (along with the raw kale salad we can't get enough of), arugula, tomato, and david's first seitan sausage.  it was so finger-licking good that i have to stop typing for a second to get a snack because the pictures are making me hungry.

 bean is making a lot of progress feeding herself with a spoon, and now takes large bites of certain things without needing them cut up.  big girl!

she continues talking a lot, with intelligible words sprinkled here and there.  but she has an impressive vocabulary and can point to anything around the house or in any of her books if you say the word.  she's also getting very interested in tasks we do...sweeping, wiping, picking things up, helping with reese...we hope she maintains interest when she's old enough to be effective.

not sure if it's because she's picking up speed lately or our apartment is just very difficult to navigate even for the nimble-footed, but she falls constantly.  she slips, trips, and sometimes inexplicably just topples over.  she got a little overly-excited a few nights ago when our bedroom was briefly left open and unattended...we found her seconds later balled on the floor screaming with a mouthful of blood.  such are the adventures of parenting a toddler.  as usual, she was over it quickly.

on a side note, her hair is slightly bigger and more awesome daily.

 big guy has continued to protest naps, so we've had to lay down the law a little harder and get him back in the routine.  he's doing ok with it since we reintroduced the sleep sheep noise machine.  he makes the cutest little squinty perplexed face when he wakes up because he sleeps in our pitch black bathroom (this is actually not the most obvious daily indication we need a larger place)...i haven't been able to adequately capture it yet, but this is close:

other than that, my fingers have been busy on the needles with various projects (just ordered the last of my xmas knitting yarn), and other crafts in preparation for homemade xmas are underway, with lots of help from the two elves.  we have plans to erect the tree in the next week or so.........negotiations continue regarding who will string the lights.